Sermon 5/13/12
John 15:9-17
Changed from Glory into Glory: Friends
When I
was in high school, I particularly liked a song that was added to the movie
version of the Andrew Lloyd Webber musical Evita,
a song called “You Must Love Me,” added for the star of the movie, Madonna, as
an additional solo ballad. The song has a double meaning. It features near the
end of the movie, when Eva Peron, the first lady of Argentina, is dying of
cancer. The song features a series of questions that suggest that Eva is amazed
that her husband, President Juan Peron, is standing by her side even though her
body is failing. “Why are you at my side? How can I be any use to you now?” she
sings. The chorus repeats the mantra, “You must love me,” as words of
discovery. “Oh, because you are doing this, staying with me, it means that you
must love me.” It is a refrain of wonder, awe that she is so loved by her
husband.
But the song has a double meaning. Eva Peron had a strong
desire to be loved by everyone, at least according to some accounts. She wanted
the love of the poor, the middle-class, the wealthy, the political leaders, the
military, the leaders of other governments, and certainly her husband. She
wanted to be loved. And so “You must love me” is also her command. “You have to love me! I insist on it.” Many
of her actions are variations on attempts to make sure that everyone adores her.
Of course, we know, don’t we, that you can’t demand
someone love you. Well, you can, but
it isn’t very effective. Since we are talking about songs, another favorite of
mine is a Bonnie Raitt standard: “I Can’t Make You Love Me.” It is the ultimate
unrequited love song. “I can’t make you love me if you don’t. You can’t make
your heart feel something it won’t.” If you have ever fallen in love with
someone, but not had your feelings returned, you know that you can’t simply get
someone to love you, at least not romantically, by sheer force of will, right?
So, can you make someone love? Can someone demand that
you love? Command it? Despite our wisdom gleaned from pop music, Jesus seems to
think differently. “This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have
loved you. No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s
friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. You did not choose me
but I chose you. I am giving you these commands so that you may love one
another.” Well, Jesus says he commands us
to love one another! And he says that if we are friends, we will do what he
commands. Now, I don’t know how your friendships work, but I try to command my
friends all the time, and for some reason, they get really cranky about it! But
seriously, what are we to make of a commandment to love? The Bible is full of commandments,
but Jesus has only a couple that he seems to spend any time on at all. He
commands us to love God, and love one another.
On the
one hand, this might seem like an easy out. I think the Old Testament lists 613
commandments for us to follow. Jesus doesn’t ever say these aren’t important
commandments, but he does say that we often miss the point of it all, the
spirit of it all, which is love. So remembering to love God and neighbor rather
than 613 other things seems like a good deal. But on the other hand, to be commanded to love, when we start to
think about it, may not be as easy as it sounds. For example, when Jesus
commands us to love, I think we sometimes play this mental game with ourselves.
Well, I love everybody, but I don’t like everybody. I love you, I just don’t
like you very much. That doesn’t sound like very powerful, deep love, does it?
Jesus says that great love is love where a friend will give up life for a
friend. Would you give up your life for someone you didn’t like? Someone about
whom you would say, “Well, I love you, but I don’t like you?” Jesus is talking about something deep, and we tend to
want to make his words more shallow, which strips them of all their power. Can
you imagine Jesus saying, “I love you, but I don’t like you very much?”
Still,
how do we love one another? Because
even if “I love you, I just don’t like you” isn’t a very deep love, sometimes,
it is just exactly how we feel, isn’t it? So what can we do? How can we follow
Jesus' commands? I don’t have a pat answer for that, but I have some ideas.
Jesus says he has made know to us everything he knows from God. To me, that
means that in Jesus' teaching and example, we have all we need to love like
Jesus loves, like Jesus commands. When I look at Jesus, I see first someone who
was in relationship with people! That means he spent time with people – quality
time, real time, in real conversation with all kinds of people. Jesus spent an
enormous amount of time with people who were not like him, with people who did
not like him, with people who wanted to kill him actually. Jesus isn’t asking
us to love in the abstract, to love from afar. Jesus wants us to love one
another, real love, real people. And to love one another, we need to be in
relationships.
Jesus
acted with compassion rather than judgment. I've talked with you about the word
compassion before – one of my favorite Greek words – splanchizomai – literally
stomach-in-knots with concern for someone. Remember last Sunday when we talked
about the vine and branches, I mentioned how branches don’t prune other
branches? You can’t really love someone if you are too busy judging them and
thinking about the things they do wrong all the time. Jesus looked at people
and certainly could see to their souls, sins and all – but his reaction was to
be moved with compassion, not
judgment, not judgment disguised as concern, but gut-wrenching compassion. Can
you see from your neighbor's point of view? Walk in their shoes? Practice
compassion, and open a place for love in your heart.
Jesus
commands us to love, and it is both a lifelong challenge, and the very thing we
were created for. Rev. Edward Markquart, a pastor whose sermons I love, writes
this, “It’s about love, love, love. From the moment you are born until the
moment you die; and every second and every minute and every hour and every day
and every month and every year and every decade, the purpose of life is God
giving you and me the time to learn how to love, as God loves. The purpose of
time, of every moment and every day and every year is that God is teaching us
what it means to be truly loving people. That’s what it is all about. That is
what it has always been about. God commands us to love one another in these
ways. It is like God commanding fish to swim. It is like commanding birds to
fly. It is like God commanding daffodils to be beautiful. When God commands us
to love as God loves, God is simply commanding us to be the kind of people that
we were created to be in the first place. We were created in the image of God;
we are like God; and God is love.” (1)
Finally,
remember that Jesus, who calls us friends, commands us to love not to drive us
crazy, or give us an impossible standard to live up to, but to give us exactly
what we seek. He says, “I have said these things to you so that my joy may be
in you, and that your joy may be complete.” Complete joy. Have you ever
experienced such a thing as complete joy? Think over your life experiences.
Think about the times in your life when you have felt the most joy – the most
sheer, unblemished, undiluted joy. I’m going to guess that these experiences of
joy probably have something to do with experiences of love as well, that our
experiences of joy are never just about us, but always have something to do
with the relationships in our lives. Jesus speaks to us of commandments, not to
burden us, but to free us, because he wants us to have this joy not just in
fleeting moments, but in complete, as a regular part of our living. “I have
said these things to you so that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be
complete.” So today, let’s be followers of the rules. And of all the rules
we’re bound by, of all you can choose to follow, why not choose obedience to
the one commandment that promises everything in exchange for your obedience.
Let’s love, and be loved, and love and be loved. Amen.
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